Try sleeping with a broken heart.

Too much drama happened lately and this is what I get after coming back from Penang. I tried not to think about it and tried to think about the sweet memories back in Penang but I just can't. I tried acting happy in front of my family members and friends. But when I'm alone, the moment is killing me. The flashback in Penang is just overlapped by the haunted feeling.

I tried to occupy myself with stuff and watch tons of funny videos, listen to tons of rock 'n' roll songs, just to kill the sadness hiding within myself. Yea, it did have some effect on it. After a while, it eventually came back. The feeling is haunting me.

I wanted to know the reason, about why am I such an awful person to you. I tried thinking about it over and over again. I even searched my MSN history but I got nothing there. I read your blog and the post you wrote was deleted. What does that mean? I have so many question marks in my head now. I am a pathetic person to you but I don't even know why I am to you. Do you know that feeling is killing me? About not knowing why people hate you while you think you did nothing to that particular person?

I know I must have done something which made you think I'm that kind of person. If you don't tell me, how am I gonna know and how am I gonna change? Therefore, I need to know. Please tell me, even if it may hurt me or something. I just need to know.

And to you. About what you've written in my post. I really appreciate it. You've finally made me come to a realisation on what kind of person I am to you. I know there are certainly things that I've done that might have hurt you and I am now, sincerely apologising to you. But even if I say my apology, I know you won't accept it. So yeah, thanks for letting me know how you feel. At the same time, I want to let you know that you are not always right. I'm not trying to fight or humiliate you. I just want to make you realise that being harsh to people might make them stay away from you. Just telling you, no offence.

So yeah, that's all from me. Sorry if I have done something offensive to you girls. Call me a bastard or whatever. I swear I won't fight back, not even a single word about it.

Sadness leads to hopeless.

Wonder what feeling am I experiencing now. Cried like a baby just now. How long have I not been crying like this, eh? Such a release~

C'mon~~ It's after my Penang trip, why should I bother so much? I should be flashing back all the good memories now~ YEAHHHH~~~

OK, Imma stop this now. Bye bye.

Yay!

It's TODAY! I am so so so so so excited! TONS OF FUN!!

Penang, here I come~~

Let's get it started, yeah ha!

Dear Seniors of SMK Tropicana, our one and only big event of the year, which comes with the theme of Glamour, which is our,

TROPICANA'S PROM NIGHT 2010

has finally come. In fact, it's TOMORROW. So people,

ARE YOU READY TO GET THE NIGHT STARTED?!

Trash just simply refers me.

I.. am such an awful person. I'm arrogant, I'm selfish, I'm brainless and I'm useless. Someone, please throw me into a garbage bin now. I am just merely a trash that nobody wants.

Don't dry with fakes or tears.

It's 1.37 in the morning now. And yet, I'm still awake. How amazing is that. =.=

I guess this is life after SPM, eh? Sleep, eat, sleep and eat. But mine isn't that bad actually. There are still tons of things that I gotta do and I just did one of it today! It was planning my Penang trip with my fella comrades. I guess we had it all covered up, eh? Just waiting to meet up with Mable and confirm everything with her.

Then next, Prom Night. I am so so sorry to leave my beloved organiser, Kai Ting to go to Royale Bintang all by herself. She was like doing everything about Prom Night all by herself and I felt so sorry about it. Actually, I wanted to accompany her but I just promised my other friends to plan my Penang trip first, so it can't be helped. =X. I hope that she's not mad at me though. =P. Anyway, I'm sorry. Let me know whenever you need my help, k? Anytime and anywhere, I swear.

Next, moving house. Sis called me today during my Penang-trip-planning session. She asked me to help my father in settling the things up. And there was this one time I, well.. actually was unhappy about it because he asked me to follow him there but ended up asking me to rest over there because everything was almost done. When I came to think of it, I think he just simply needed some company. He has been doing everything all by himself and as a part of the family, all I've done is not even half of what he did and I'm surely feeling bad about it, again.

And furthermore, I know there has been a finance problem occurring in my family recently but he's just not showing it in front of us. All he did was just keeping quiet about it. I know he didn't want us to worry about it therefore he kept quiet but why can't he just understand that we're one family? Shouldn't a family share everything with each other? Even if it worries us, but at least, we won't be spending money like nobody's business and most importantly, there will be someone carrying your burdens along with you and that will be us. So why can't you just tell us? We're all grown up. We longer are the kids who always begs you to buy us ice-creams. So, let us carry some of your burdens, k? This is the reason why a family is needed.

Alright, it's 1.56am now. Gotta get into bed. My eyelids are super duper heavy now.

Memory lane.

I have been sleeping for the whole freaking long day. Reason? I'm EXHAUSTED due to my lack of sleep last night. I stayed awake until 7am eh! GENG leh! xD

And yeah, FYI, SPM is OFFICIALLY OVER! Happy? Sad? Seriously, it's hard to tell. Happy, because all my hardword finally has been paid off and I'm really excited about what college life really is. Sad, because we're leaving high school. I mean, we have already left high school since the first day of taking SPM. TIME REALLY DOES FLY. It's already December and I'd go back to December all the time~ Aha. Taylor Swift again. xD By the way, this song is nice, you should go and listen to it, it's called "Back to December". =D

So hmm. Guess that I'll be looking for job. I NEED a job which the working hour is like the office's working hour. Anyone has any suggestion? =)

Have yourself a Merry Little Christmas.

Aha. SPM is already OVER! Well, for those who are taking Chinese, just ASSUME that it is. =D And sadly, tomorrow I'll be taking another exam, an unofficial one, Entrance Level Exam. =(

Anyway, I'm just so so excited to blog now. Firstly, it's because my damn internet finally functions properly! In the past few days, it kept on disconnecting which made me feel damn frustrated. My bro said it's due to the presence of my sis. Cause once she gets back from Malacca everytime, the internet will sure be disconnected. xD

Secondly, I have tons of things to share. According to what I've mentioned in the past few posts (if you ever read), I have tons of plans after 14th of December. Firstly, I've got to start planning for my Penang trip, which I'm really really looking forward to. Things to buy, places to visit etc etc. It just can't be done! Secondly, PROM NIGHT! Lots of things to plan such as.. ATTIRE! Seriously, I have NO IDEA what to wear. Black coat with tie? White long sleeve with black pants? AHH! Can't decide. And I've still got to plan the agenda and everything with my fellow organisers! SOOOOO many things await me!

Furthermore, I still got to shift my house. And I've painted and designed my new room (with Thomas's helping) and it looks something like this:

Yes, it looks like some trees with a freaking huge 8-sided-instead-of-6-sided snowflake. And what's even worse is, my bro said my room now looks like a holy place where the Christians pray, due to my painting. =.= Anyway, I've repainted the "trees and snowflake" and it looks like this now:


After repainting, I was kinda regret doing that. It looks better with white, right? BLAH, who cares. Christmas is coming now anyway, isn't it? ;)

Wish I'd never grown up.

1 more subject to go. 3 freaking papers. BIOLOGY! Well, it's actually not only 1 subject, but 2. Still got Chinese. But I'm feeling like SPM is over right after Biology papers. LOL! I think it's because I'm good at Chinese and I need not worry about it. ELEH! LANCI! xD

Time really passes fast. SPM is ending really soon in just the blink of an eye. What have I done in this year? Did I waste all of my time throughout the whole year? Did I make a difference? Did I change myself? I don't know. It's hard to tell by myself.

Time flies. Things changed. People changed. Changed because of we're all grown up now. We finally see things differently. Our thoughts aren't as innocent as before now. We have our own dreams, our own targets to achieve. Sometimes I really wish I'd never grown up. Everything could still be simple cause we don't need to deal with so many things. Ahhhh. Isn't that wonderful? But it will never happen, will it? =(

Alright. It's 11.30pm now. Time to get into bed as I can see my pillow is waving at me now. Nights! =D

You have a problem with that?

Seriously, I don't know what has gotten into your mind now. Could you PLEASE tell me? What is really WRONG WITH YOU? HUH?!

Shifting to a new house and living in a new room are supposed to be exciting and happy. But you just simply took them all away from me. The living room, you can paint/decorate/design allllllllllllll the way you want. But my room, NO.

It's MY ROOM. And I want to paint it with my favourite colours. What the hell is so wrong with that? I already gave in ENOUGH by not wanting red as my room colour. And now I want another colour which you AGREED BEFORE. And yet, you have a damn problem with the outcome.

You're always like that. You have your own opinions and you just simply ASSUME everyone has the same opinions as yours. Do you think that we don't have our own mind? Even if we told you ours, you'll just give excuses by complaining this and that and lastly, you'll just ignore it. That's it. Do you even care? Do you even pay attention to our interests? If you say you do, sorry but I don't feel it AT ALL.

I am NOT going to give in any longer. If I want it that way, it MUST be that way. This is MY room, MY stuff, MY place. You have no right in controlling MY stuff here, cause I'm going to FIGHT FOR IT.

FULL STOP.

Show 'em what you're worth.

A very meaningful song, video and lyrics. Katy Perry looks really gorgeous here. =)

Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?
Drifting through the wind
Wanting to start again
Do you ever feel, feel so paper thin?
Like a house of cards
One blow from caving in
Do you ever feel already buried deep?
Six feet under screams but no one seems to hear a thing
Do you know that there's still a chance for you?
'Cause there's a spark in you

You just gotta ignite the light and let it shine
Just own the night like the 4th of July

'Cause baby, you're a firework
Come on, show them what you're worth
Make them go "oh oh oh"
As you shoot across the sky-y-y
Baby, you're a firework
Come on, let your colours burst
Make them go "oh oh oh"
You're gonna leave them falling down-ow-ow

You don't have to feel like a waste of space
You're original, cannot be replaced
If you'd only knew what the future holds
After a hurricane, comes a rainbow
Maybe your reason why all the doors are closed
So you could open the one that leads you to the perfect road
Like a lightning bolt, your heart will glow
And when it's time, you'll know

You just gotta ignite the light and let it shine
Just own the night like the 4th of July

'Cause baby, you're a firework
Come on, show them what you're worth
Make them go "oh oh oh"
As you shoot across the sky-y-y
Baby, you're a firework
Come on, let your colours burst
Make them go "oh oh oh"
You're gonna leave them falling down-ow-ow

Boom boom boom
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon
It's always been inside of you, you, you
And now it's time to let it boom-oom-oom

'Cause baby, you're a firework
Come on, show them what you're worth
Make them go "oh oh oh"
As you shoot across the sky-y-y
Baby, you're a firework
Come on, let your colours burst
Make them go "oh oh oh"
You're gonna leave them falling down-ow-ow

Boom boom boom
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon
Boom boom boom
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon

- Firework,
Katy Perry

Be still!

给曼谦的话，

刚刚看了你的部落格，发现现在的你生活得很好。这对我来说，应该是种安慰吧。其实自从你家里发生了一连串的事后，我都以为你会生活在痛苦中。当时的我们(HSD PTC 和PIC)都不知要如何帮助你。而我们唯能做的，就只能送题目给你和你的家人。

其实，要一个小孩来面对这种情况是非常地痛苦的。换作是我的话，我也会不知所措。但你让我认识了一个全新的你。为了要面对这种情况，你不得不坚强起来。所以，我有时候都被你给打动到了。因此，你必须振作！你还有三个弟妹需要照顾，明年还要考SPM，你一定要胜利起来！证明给先生看，你是可以的！当然，题目也一定不可忘记。

对了，还有一件事。其实我们全部都很期待能跟你见面。过了这么久，连你有没有变样都不知道了！呵呵。。而我们也很希望你能跟我们一起去Penang的。一来，我们可以叙下旧情～ 二来，我们也可以通过这次的trip 来知道更多关于Penang人的广宣流布的做法。何乐而不为呢？但如果你坚持不去的话，我们也不会勉强你的～ After Penang trip我们也可以出来找你喝茶啊～ 哈哈哈。

喔！还有！听东成说，你弟弟正开始唱题了。听了之后，我很开心！同时的，我也感到很欣慰。帮我向他说声谢谢！谢谢他可以再一次地跪在御本尊面前地唱题！题目的力量，不是你我可以衡量得到的。所以你们所祈求的东西，一定可以达成的！加油！

我好像很罗嗦酱hor？xD 好了，明天还要考Moral。再见！^^

A drink in my hand, eh?

Hey hey you you! I don't like your girlfriend! No way no way! You could find a new one! LOL. It's been a while since the last time I heard this song. xD

Anyway, I'm here to blog because I've finish memorising the 36 nilais for my Moral test tomorrow. So now I'm kinda chillex~ xD

Time flies, eh? After tomorrow, half of my subjects will be left not taken which is 5 more subjects to go. After SPM, a new life awaits me. A new challenge awaits me. A new ME! Therefore, I shall not let my guard down at this moment. Instead, I should strive to the fullest so that I'll be filled with a strong life force!

How spirit-ful I am, eh? xD

Goddamnit.

Oh my oh my. What have I done? Did I ACCIDENTALLY offend you? I just don't get what's the point of showing me that shit look of yours. I hate it so damn freaking much.

Did you think that I did NOT put my effort and heart onto it? YOU JUST DON'T BOTHER LOOKING AT IT. So how can I IMPRESS you? Did you look at me? Yeah, you did. Only the negative sides. I'm SICK OF IT.

Human makes mistake and you and I are NOT excluded! Did you think that you did not make any mistakes? I'm not sure what were you thinking but you always try to give yourself excuses about your mistakes. You talk all the way you want. You make it sounds like it's the TRUTH but you're actually making a fool out of yourself. You always have that loud opinion of yours but who's listening? You just make me think that you're pathetic than you already are.

If you ever try to tell me I should respect you, yes, I DO respect you from the bottom of my heart. But what will my respect do any good if you don't respect me? I NEED to be respected, too! So please. Change this attitude as it's making me sick.

Ohya. I DETEST it when YOU suddenly come in to my room and see me sitting in front of the computer and asking sarcastically, "Reading now ah??". If your intention of saying this is to make me study, sorry, it works the other way round. I don't know whether you're joking or being sarcastic but please stop it, cause I f-ing hate it. Thank you.

Regrets are regrettable.

Alright erm. About the previous post which talks about I'm not going to blog until SPM ends, well, please just kindly ignore it. =)

SPM has been easy, NOT! It was quite tough. But yeah, I've done my best and I have no regrets, SO FAR. Alright. Anyway, regrets are kinda useless when the mistake is done, right?

What's the point of feeling guilty and regret about things when the damage is already done? Will it change the outcome? Will it be able to avoid the consequences from happening? It just won't change a thing, will it? It's the fact cause it's ALREADY there. You can't help it but to watch the guilt eats away your pride no matter how unwillingly you are.

But, there are certainly things that could be done to wash the guilt away. Start making things to WORK and better once you've done the damage. It's not necessarily to do it like how a Superman does but at least you'll take the effort of changing the outcome of how things would have probably turned out. Stop feeling guilty and regret or cry like a baby cause it won't help a thing AT ALL. Instead, do your best in fixing the problems after things turn out badly. I'm sure the outcome will certainly be changed. Regrets are much regreattable than it already is.

Alright, time to hit the shower. I'll see you on the 14th of December, alright? =)

Stupidest Papers in Malaysia - SPM.

Hello. Just dropping by to say "Goodbye". I won't be blogging until the 14th of December as SPM is starting from tomorrow onwards. So, wish me luck. Will you? ;)

I don't wanna walk s-o-l-o.

Why the nearer SPM is, the urge of studying becomes weaker? I seriously have no mood, not a single urge or desire of reading the books AT ALL. What should I do other than chanting? I tried forcing myself to read but it just won't work. The more I force myself, the harder it enters my brain.

Am I stressing myself out? But from my mum's words, I'm relaxing and procrastinating like nobody's business. I think she's right. I've been slacking like nothing's ever gonna happen. I keep on thinking that SPM is just a life process, it's seriously no big deal at all. I guess I'm just too over-thinking it. I'm an expert in giving myself excuses and more excuses.

SPM is just a life process and I should not OVER-stress myself out for this. Agree with this statement? =(

Quartet of Gaga's.

This is really cool. It's a quartet version of Lady Gaga's collections performed by Vitamin String Quartet. Check them out!

Poker Face




Paparazzi

Bad Romance

Telephone

Alejandro

Yay!

Ehe. I am getting my own car. =D. But not a new one. My cousins sis's. It's a Proton Iswara. I know when you people hear the word "Proton", you will think that it's a lousy cheap car. xD. Yeap, I do too. But who cares? As long as I have my OWN car to drive around. =D

So now, my family has altogether 4 cars. I don't know where my father wants to park all the cars lor. =.=

Awesome shit.

I know you guys will definitely come and read this so here I am, telling you how I feel.

Firstly, I did not say anytime. I said BY 2pm I had to reach Zo Ee's house to watch my cartoon series. And you said we'll meet up at 12.30pm. OK fine. I reached there at 12.40pm and I THOUGHT I was late. But hell no. I was the earliest. Nevermind. I ordered my food, finished them by 1pm. You guys were not there yet. FINE, AGAIN. I waited. Until the clock struck 1.30pm, I called Zo Ee and she said you guys HAVEN'T fetch her yet. I couldn't give in any longer. So I left and told her that count me out for the study group, as I NEED to rush back home to watch my cartoon series.

Maybe you guys may think that it's just a cartoon series. WHAT'S SO BIG DEAL ABOUT IT?! But I can tell you that, no. It MEANS A LOT to me. Why the hell do you guys think that I was so free distributing each flyer to you guys? I sifat han is it? The answer is simple. BECAUSE IT MEANS A LOT TO ME, as I mentioned just now. But you guys didn't try to understand me. The flyers were left all over your tables. But I can't blame you guys, too, since you guys have nothing to do with the series. So yeah.

And you guys may think that you guys were JUST late. Do I ever need to be so angry about it? Yes. I don't need to. I'm angry NOT because of you guys were late. It's because you guys were irresponsible. In scouts, I believe that punctuality is what Sir Colin always highlights. If you guys can do it in scouts, why not applying them in your daily lives, too? And I believe that this isn't the first time you make me waited.

So yeah. This is what I feel and think. Thanks for reading. I appreciate it a lot.

Make a vow.

Lately I've been thinking a lot of stuff. Stuff about friendship, mostly, and I appreciate it so much as I know I won't be able to find a better one.

Do you still remember how we met each other? It was Form 1. I heard my sis saying that there was a girl from SGM in my class and I was so shocked and excited, but I didn't know who you were. xD. Soon, I knew your existence. xD. And we were not that close yet. Then later, I found you in scouts and we were assigned to the same patrol for Maju Hike. Remember? I think that was the first time we ever properly talked as we were the only PBs from Fiery Phoenix. xD. Then, we got together so closely after that. I still remember I kept on annoying you with some Pussycat Dolls' songs throughout the whole hiking. xD. Now when I come to think of it, the friendship between us was so pure and wonderful. We told each other everything and we laughed all the way till we grow up. Isn't that just so magically wonderful?

Soon, I found another bestie. You weren't from my class and yet we were so close. Do you still remember we went to Zoo Negara together with our families? That time you were so innocent. xD. You were so curious about the songs that I sang and therefore I explained the meanings of them to you, and you were so quietly listening, unlike now. xD. And I still remember we 3 saw a bat with a long long penis and you were like, "Look! it's a freaking long penis!". But it wasn't actually a penis though. xD Then sooner, we were assigned as HSD PTCs and we hang out even more ever since.

P50. We got even closer that time. And you, with your annoying edited version of "Shut Up And Drive", it made us all so irritated by that song. But now when I come to think of it, it was actually this song that made us all smile when the memory flashes back. Then you, made me smile again when I think of the "Fei Ju Yok" pinching your arm when you were doing the "fan". It was all so perfectly fine and pure. A pure friendship we shared and that's the most memorable thing that's ever happened in my life.

Then, we became best friends ever since. And you even came to our class in Form 3 and seriously, I was really really happy for me and for you. Happy is because we these 3 besties finally got to stay in the same class, sitting next to each other and gossiping about others. And 2 of you, I have seen 2 of you cried. The first time I ever saw you cry was because of Pn Woi was about to leave us. Then you, cried in our PD Training Camp because you felt sorry for Man Qian. Do you guys still remember all these wonderful moments? The moments that we shared our laughter, our tears and our faith? We even had a small "meeting" about our attitudes after the PD Training Camp in your apartment. Remember?

And now. We've grown up. We are not as innocent as what we used to be anymore. We have our dreams, our own targets to achieve. While looking back at those moments, I believe that each of us cherish them all the time. The friendship we share has become even stronger, our bond is unbreakable now.

The reason why I'm writing this is because I want you guys to know that I appreciate it a lot, like real a lot. And I cherish them all the time. Even some of the time we might quarrel over a small tiny matter, but those were the moments that our bonds were tighten even stronger.

And I also would like to let my another dear friend to know that, friendship is what we NEED in our lives. Not a want, not a must, but a NEED. Simply ending a friendship is merely stupid. Don't overreacted when a friend is asking you to back off and leave the friendship behind. If you do so, you're the same as her. You complain that she doesn't appreciate you as much as you appreciate her and therefore you try to give up on this friendship. But have you ever noticed that you have been wasting your time and breath all this while on this particular friend if you ever give up on her? So why not might as well just leave the friendship behind in the first place since you plan to give up now? So my friend, friendship is really really important. Friends are the ones who laugh with us, cry for us, SACRIFICE for us. Best friends? I don't even need to mention about that as you already know how IMPORTANT is that. So, don't ever give up on her, k? =)

Ah. Finally I'm done typing. =D

Need your love.

当你选择拉远了距离

就这么自私做的决定

冲破天际飞去

排山倒海崩塌的回忆

无时无刻袭击我的心

痛得不能自己

或许你以为把这一座城市抛开

就可以终结伤害

却不明白

我需要你的爱

不管多少阻碍

不求什么未来

不管命运会怎么安排

我会用眼泪洗去所有的不堪

狠狠地把心痛了断

深深地把一切重来

我需要你的爱

像掉进了深海

也像坠落悬崖

找不到地方可以逃开

别让那些谎言把爱给活埋

当心碎成一块一块

当爱碎成一段一段

我会等待

你的爱

排山倒海崩塌的回忆
无时无刻袭击我的心
痛得不能自己

或许你以为把这一座城市抛开
就可以终结伤害
却不明白

我需要你的爱
不管多少阻碍
不求什么未来
不管命运会怎么安排
我会用眼泪洗去所有的不堪
狠狠地把心痛了断
深深地把一切重来

我需要

我需要你的爱
像掉进了深海
也像坠落悬崖
找不到地方可以逃开
别让那些谎言把爱给活埋
当心碎成一块一块
当爱碎成一段一段
我会等待

我会等待

我会等待

别让那些谎言把爱给活埋

当心碎成一块一块

当爱碎成一段一段

我会等待

－需要你的爱

F.I.R.

'Cause baby you're a firework.

Yay! I am feeeeeeeeeling AWEEEEEEESOME! Why? Because I choose to be happy instead of sad!

It's true that it hurts me a lot, like real a lot. But that does not matter anymore now. Because I'm clear with my targets. All I need to focus now is SIJIL PELAJARAN MALAYSIA (SPM)! After that, I'm sure I'll be able to forget everything cause I have TONS OF PLANS AFTER SPM! First of all, PROM NIGHT! Can't wait to see my leng leng partner, Kai Ting wearing a leng leng gown. xD

After prom night, PENANG TRIP! I SERIOUSLY CAN'T WAIT TILL THAT MOMENT! I'm ABSOLUTELY going to have TONS AND LOTS OF FUN with my greatest comrades ever! Somemore can go visit their kaikan over there, which is also 10 quarter of my wish. xD. There's one wish of mine. I hope that I can travel around Malaysia and go to every single kaikan in every state! After that, I'll go backpacking like what Mable always wants us to. xD. And I'll take a picture of myself standing proudly in front of every kaikan! I'm longing for the arrival of that day!

Thirdly, my friends are planning to celebrate my birthday next year at GENTING HIGHLANDS! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. THEME PARK!! Gosh. It has been about 10 YEARS since the last time I been to Genting. LOTSA LOTSA FUN AFTER SPM! =D

So yeah. That's the fun part of finishing Form 5. xD. And to all my friends/comrades. Thanks for all of your concern about the thing happened lately to me. I'm doing real fine and I promise, I will NEVER EVER be that down anymore in front of any of you. And I'm sorry if I ever let you guys worried about me, especially for those who saw me emo at Plus 8 last night. xD. So yeah. Buh bye!

The story of us.

Sometimes I wonder what do you really want from me. You gave me hope and you took them all away at the same freaking time. Did you, no. DO you even care about me in the first place? If you say you do, sorry but I DON'T feel it AT ALL. It just isn't there.

Showing off your boyfriend to me for what? Make me jealous? How FUNNY is that cause I don't feel A THING at all. Did I even say I liked you? Did I even say I give a damn about your damn freaking love life? I DIDN'T EVEN HAVE ANY THOUGHTS ABOUT IT. So how do you expect ME to even TALK to you? You just disgust me.

You think you're pretty. Yes, you are. You think I liked you. Yes, you WERE right. I just don't feel the electric touch anymore when I see your texts and everything. It's just NOT like what it used to be anymore.

So can you PLEASE stop telling me about your boyfriend and how awesome is your love life? I.. just couldn't accept it.. Maybe I still have feelings for you. Maybe I just couldn't let it go. But I KNOW I HAVE TO. You already have a boyfriend. So please. Please leave me alone. You are not the only girl in the world. And I believe I worth a much more better one than your type.

You're a nice girl. And from all your texts, I know your boyfriend is a nice guy, too. I'm glad you have a boyfriend like that, seriously. But if your intention of telling me how great your boyfriend is, is to make me jealous, please stop it. You know I couldn't accept it and you're being unfair to your boyfriend. You may go on with your love life even if it sometimes may hurt me but it doesn't matter. I know this feeling of mine will slowly fade away cause it already is.

So yeah. Thanks for loving me, cause you were doing it perfectly.

Too young to be messed with.

Haiz. This feeling comes back again... How can I overcome it? Tell me, will you?

Dear you.

I.. have nothing to say. Seeing you like this, I'm totally speechless. What can I do? Scold you? Punch you? Advice you? You'll never accept any of these, will you? I just know you way too well.

Asking me to eat shit because someone asking you to do stuff instead of asking me? Did you really think that I wanted to let you handle that kind of stuff? I didn't want to, too, but I had no choice, did I? All you are is mean, which totally makes me think that you're pathetic.

I don't want to care anymore. I don't want to be the one who's always feeling sad anymore. I no longer am the boy who you think you could simply control because of your highly thoughts and elder age.

Someday. Someday you'll be seeing me respected by people because I deserve to. Unlike you.

Back to December.

I'm so glad you made time to see me
How's life?
Tell me how's your family
I haven't seen them in a while
You've been good, busier than ever
We small talk, work and the weather
Your guard is up and I know why

Because the last time
You saw me is still burned in the back of your mind
You gave me roses
And I left them there to die

So this is me swallowing my pride
Standing in front of you saying, "I'm sorry for that night"
And I go back to December all the time
It turns out freedom, ain't nothing but missing you
Wishing that I realised what I had when you were mine
I'd go back to December, turn around and make it all right
I go back to December all the time

These days I haven't been sleeping
Staying up playing back myself leaving
When your birthday passed and I didn't call
And I think about summer, all the beautiful time
I watched you laughing from the passenger side
Realised I loved you in the fall

Then the cold came
The dark days when fear crept into my mind
You gave me all your love and all I gave you was
"Goodbye"

So this is me swallowing my pride
Standing in front of you saying, "I'm sorry for that night"
And I go back to December all the time
It turns out freedom, ain't nothing but missing you
Wishing that I realised what I had when you were mine
I'd go back to December, turn around and change my own mind
I go back to December all the time

I missed your tanned skin, your sweet smile
So good to me, so right
And how you held me in your arms that September night
The first time you ever saw me cry
Maybe this is wishful thinking
Probably mindless dreaming
If we loved again, I swear I'd love you right

I'd go back in time and change it, but I can't
So if the chain is on your door, I understand

But this is me swallowing my pride
Standing in front of you saying, "I'm sorry for that night"
And I'd go back to December
It turns out freedom, ain't nothing but missing you
Wishing that I'd realised what I had when you were mine
I'd go back to December, turn around and make it all right
I'd go back to December, turn around and change my own mind
I'd go back to December all the time
All the time

Never grow up.

Oh, I don't wanna grow up
Wish I'd never grown up
I could still be little
Oh, I don't wanna grow up
Wish I'd never grown up
It could still be simple

Oh, darling don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up
Just stay this little
Oh, darling don't you ever grow up
Don't you ever grow up
It could stay this simple

Won't let nobody hurt you
Won't let no one break your heart
And even though you want to
Please try to never grow up
Oh, don't you ever grow up
Oh, never grow up
Just never grow up

- Never Grow Up,
Taylor Swift

Words for you.

嗨~ 我又来了~ xD. 现在用华文来写部落格是因为不想给他看得明白。xD

Haiz..现在的孩子到底怎么了？怎么对父母越来越没礼貌啊？他们是生我们出来的人、抚养我们长大成人的人、给予我们爱心的人。但他们得来的竟然是孩子的不孝与高傲。你说应该吗？

今天婆婆只不过想出去新家看看，需要你来帮忙载，你就摆脸色给我们看。这还不要紧。妈妈听说你肚子饿，所以跟你说晚饭要准备好了。你竟然敢敢用无礼的态度对她大呼小叫，叫她不要吵，说你想要出去吃。虽然妈妈没出声，但你知道她掉了眼泪吗？是我亲眼看到的！你觉得让一个怀了你九个月的人，然后把你抚养长大的人流下这种心酸的眼泪应该吗？

还有，在载我们去新家的路途中，你比平时驾得更快。难道你以为我不知道你不爽吗？你有没有想过有两位老人家坐在你后面，把车柄捉得紧紧的，你有发觉到吗？就算你不爽，也不需要拿两位老人家所剩无几的性命来当赌注吧。这只显示你是个做事鲁莽冲动的人。

更令我觉得你无孝的东西是，当你在大声地跟妈妈呼喝的时候，你说你肚子饿，想出去吃，而你也不爽妈妈罗嗦你，所以叫她不要吵。但是就算你的头脑不能function properly了，你可否用你的屁股想一想，到底是谁搞到自己肚子饿的？是你！是你自己睡觉睡到四点多都不肯醒来的！原因是？在跟女朋友不懂在里面搞什么，我没眼看。难道你就不觉得羞耻吗？还有，关于你不爽婆婆叫你载我们去新家的事。难道你以为我想去吗？是因为婆婆叫我陪她去，我才去的！当时的我累得得不得了，但是我还是陪了婆婆去，因为我知道我陪她度过的日子已不多，所以我很珍惜和她在一起的日子。你呢？你有想过这一点吗？从来都没有。你眼里只有你自己。

我并不生气你。我只觉得一个人做人做到这种地步，实在是太可悲了。你自己好好地用你的屁股去想一想我所说的事吧。

Thank you.

I am so in the mood of blogging now! You know why? If you ever ask me, well, I don't know. It just comes naturally. Maybe below is the thing that makes me want to blog about so eagerly.

Sometimes, we may encounter various types of people in the world. People that you respect, love, like, dislike or even hate. Be grateful of all these kinds of people, even for the ones that you dislike or hate. THESE are the ones who make you stronger. Trust me, it all makes sense.

For that, I really appreciate everyone in my life, especially those that disgust/irritate me. I truly thank you for appearing in my life and this is NOT sarcasm. It's just simply a fact that I've encountered recently. I really thank you from the bottom of my heart. =)

And did you guys notice that I've changed a lot? Change as in to a better human being. =D I don't address people with vulgar languages anymore, isn't that awesome? =)

Stand up, my friend.

Recently there are so many problems occurring and they're not mine, but my friends'. Should I be feeling lucky about it? I guess I should. xD

Anyway, to my dearest friend. As I said, do not EVER, EVER give in to him. He's the kind of person who always takes things for granted and you already knew this bad attitude of his and why are you still giving in to him ALL THE TIME? He always complains about you talking to other boys and this is how he defines 'flirting'. Well, you also noticed that he keeps on talking to the other girls as well, is that how you define 'flirting' as well? No. You just simply don't mind. My friend, you've already gave in ENOUGH. It's time for you to STAND UP FOR YOURSELF and tell him how you feel! Instead of letting him handling things by his own ways which might hurt you.

He doesn't talk to you because I'm your closest friend? Well, I can actually tell him that I don't really give a damn about this. His jealousy just goes WAYYYY TOO FAR. He knows that you and I are NOT POSSIBLE. So why he still behaves like this to you? You think this is fair to you? You think this kind of jealousy is good for both me and you? NO. It just simply makes me disgusted by him even more as he's behaving like a woman. Why can't he just treat you equally like how he treated his ex? Is it because he doesn't love you THAT much? Is it because he's using you? I DON'T KNOW. But there is one thing that I must assure you. If this situation continues, there is NO DOUBT that you and him will ended up breaking up and YOU DO KNOW THIS. SO, WAKE UP MY FRIEND! I know it is hard for you to do this but this is what you have to do in order to secure and protect yourself! Stop giving in to him EVERYTIME and stand up for yourself and TELL HIM YOUR FEELINGS about his attitude. I'm sure things will change after that.

And to YOU who might see this. I am just standing up for my friend and I did not involve myself this time, since you've told me that you want to settle things between YOU and YOUR GIRLFRIEND because you detest middle-man. OK fine. Settle all by your own and if I see her still hurt like this, sorry my friend. I am going to DO SOMETHING for her as a FRIEND.

DONE TALKING.

Us boys have the finest architecture.

I can't help myself but keep on thinking that THIS SONG IS SICK! It's Peacock by Katy Perry. OMG.. the lyric is just so.. Well, check it out yourself and you'll know what I mean. xD

I wanna see your peacock, cock, cock

Your peacock, cock
Your peacock, cock, cock, your peacock
I wanna see your peacock, cock, cock
Your peacock, cock

Your peacock, cock, cock, your peacock

Word on the street

You got something to show me-ee

Magical, colourful, Mr Mystery-ee

I'm intrigued for a peek, heard it's fascinating

C'mon baby let me see what you're hiding underneath

Words up your sleeve
Such a tease, wanna see the show-ow
In 3-D, a movie, heard it's beautiful-ul
Be the judge and my girls gonna take a vote
C'mon baby let me see what you're hiding underneath

I want the jaw dropping, eye poping, head turning, body shocking
I want my heart throbbing, ground shaking, show stopping, amazing

Are you brave enough to let me see your peacock?

Don't be a chicken, boy stop acting like a beeotch

I'mma piss out if you don't give me the pay off

C'mon baby let me see what you're hiding underneath
Are you brave enough to let me see your peacock?
What you're waiting for? It's time for you to show it off
Don't be a shy kinda guy, I'll bet it's beautiful

C'mon baby let me see what you're hiding underneath

I wanna see your peacock, cock, cock
Your peacock, cock

Your peacock, cock, cock, your peacock

I wanna see your peacock, cock, cock

Your peacock, cock
Your peacock, cock, cock, your peacock
I wanna see your

Skip the talk, heard it all, time to walk the walk
Brake me off, if you bad, show me who's the boss
Need some goose, to get loose, c'mon take a shot
C'mon baby let me see what you're hiding underneath

I want the jaw dropping, eye poping, head turning, body shocking
I want my heart throbbing, ground shaking, show stopping, amazing

Are you brave enough to let me see your peacock?
Don't be a chicken, boy stop acting like a beeotch
I'mma piss out if you don't give me the pay off
C'mon baby let me see what you're hiding underneath

Are you brave enough to let me see your peacock?

What you're waiting for? It's time for you to show it off

Don't be a shy kinda guy, I'll bet it's beautiful
C'mon baby let me see what you're hiding underneath

I wanna see your peacock, cock, cock

Your peacock, cock
Your peacock, cock, cock, your peacock, cock

Oh my god, no exaggeration
Boy, all this time was worth the waiting
I just shed a tear
I am so unprepared
You got the finest architecture
End of the rainbow looking treasure
Such a sight to see
And this all for me

Are you brave enough to let me see your peacock?
Don't be a chicken, boy stop acting like a beeotch
Imma piss out if you don't give me the pay off
C'mon baby let me see what you're hiding underneath

Are you brave enough to let me see your peacock?

What you're waiting for? It's time for you to show it off

Don't be a shy kinda guy, I'll bet it's beautiful
C'mon baby let me see

I wanna see your peacock, cock, cock

Your peacock, cock
(I wanna see your) peacock, cock, cock, your peacock
I wanna see your peacock, cock, cock
Your peacock, cock

(I wanna see your)
C'mon baby let me see what you're hiding underneath

So basically, this song is all about seeing someone else's penis. And FYI, beeotch = bitch. LOL

Speak now-ow.

Been listening to some of Taylor Swift's latest songs from her soon-to-be-released studio album, Speak Now. Well, the songs are not bad and I really like the album art of each song. Check it out.

Mine

Speak Now

Mean

Back to December

She looks gorgeous in these album arts, doesn't she? ;)

Spirit talk.

现在不知怎么的。突然很想把自己现在的想法分享给大家。可能是怕错过了良机，这个想法就会消失吧。而且也想用华语来表达出来。应该是自己英文的水准不太好吧！哈哈哈哈。

刚才在Man Yin 的家里开了一个会议。在那过程中，突然自己就苏醒了，就好像一个灯泡被亮了起来似的。原来一直以来，我都活在虚伪的世界里。就因为有这个东西的存在，搞到自己也变得虚伪了。Man Yin 说得很对。我们身为这个学会的一份子，不但只是不能做坏事，但我们也需要做好事。大家有听过《火车的故事》吗？它的故事是这样的。

从前有一个小男孩。他在火车里看见了一块石头。但他并没有把那块石头给搬走，因为他认为石头不是他放的。过后，那列火车就因为这块石头而发生了意外。这个故事教导我们， 虽然那男孩没有做坏事，但他也没有做过一件好事！所以，我们必须以善攻恶，就像Man Yin 所说的。恶，随时都会过来攻击我们。但是，恶，是永远都不会打败善的！

还有，刚才被Man Yin 讲了几句，自己都已开始反省了。佛法并不是一个随随便便的东西，它其实是很严格的。所以，身为会长的弟子的我们，一定要好好地反省自己！也要好好地做好广宣流布，以致能培育更多的弟子与达到世界和平的目标！为了这个重大的目标，我们一定要好好地与外人交流与对话。因为只有通过对话，我们才能把这佛法给宣传至世界各地，宣传我们佛法的五大宗旨！

Lost in thoughts.

I couldn't stand it any longer so here I am. I was doing my Add Maths. There were so many questions that I didn't know how to do and I was panicked. Suddenly there was this feeling of mine that frightened me. I was scared, as I thought about my SPM, thought about my career and thought about my future. Pressures started weighing on me out of a sudden.

Faith, I'm losing it. Self-esteem, I'm lack of it. Suddenly everything just lost in their directions, including myself. I'm lost. Lost and stuck in that terrifying moment. What should I do? I know Buddhism teaches me to have strong faith no matter what obstacles that I may encounter. But at that very moment, suddenly it all disappeared, as if they never even existed.

I'm so down right now and I can only express this feeling of mine through blogging. I'm seeking for guidance. Can someone please suggest me some?

It starts making sense.

I don't know why. I just have the urge to fulfill my desire of blogging today. Rarely I'll have this kind of desire as I find it.. well, kinda boring. Anyway, here I am, updating a little bit of the recent me.

As mentioned, trial is over and it's time for SPM and I'm 100% UNPREPARED. It's a scary statement as I, I mean WE only left about 40 days. In other words, it means we only have 1 month+ to cover up everything that we've learned in these 2 freaking years.

But at the same time, when I come to think of it, it's actually not a bad moment of my life. Everyone in this world, opps.. I mean in THIS COUNTRY, has to sit for this examination sooner or later. It's just a matter of time. So why not face it sooner instead of later? And you can't really deny that I'm such an optimistic person. xD

Well, plenty of things are waiting for me to be done after SPM. Vacations, prom and many many more! I just can't wait until that moment of my life. I swear I'll enjoy to the fullest like I never did before. Alright, time flies. I still gotta wake up tomorrow morning to attend Andrew and Rachel's Wedding Ceremony. Congrats to both of you! Finally got married! HAHAHAHA and BYE.

Only guy in the world.

I had a nightmare. A REALLL NIGHTMARE! I dreamed of SPM was today and I had not studied a thing yet! And I still remember I dreamed of studying something to do with cranberries or blueberries, it's kind of a Chemistry sub-topic. LOL!


Ohya, I'm skipping Add Maths class and Physics class later. >.<

Sparks fly, it's like electricity.

Hello people. I haven't been around for quite some time and I'm truly sorry about that. Trials were driving me nuts. So yeah, it's already over and there's something that I would like to talk about here.

In this trials week, plenty of things happened to me and my friends. Well, I don't really want to mention what had actually happened. What I'm feeling about those incidents is truly pathetic, in a way.

Life in school is always a drama. A REAL drama. Everyone is being good and nice to you, but you will NEVER know what they are actually doing behind you. Sometimes your closest friend might be the one that hates you a lot, like REAL a lot, but you are just blinded by his or her so called sincerity. And obviously, I am NOT talking about my good friends. I know they are really my true friends. Friends who would cry for you, friends who would laugh with you, friends who would SACRIFICE for you. THAT, is how I define true friends.

Yes, sometimes friends might quarrel, sometimes friends might fight over some stupid reasons. But that's the POINT of having friends! No friends, hell no. No ONE is flawless. Name me who's flawless, can you? We could really learn how to treat people and encounter different kinds of people in this world by having lots of lots of friends. Good friends are the ones who quarrel with you, they are the one who voice out anything that's in his or her mind. I am not saying that good friends should quarrel, don't mistaken me. What I'm trying to say is, if one keeps everything to him or herself, then you will find it hard to have a really strong bond with this kind of people, as you can't and won't know what's truly inside them.

Well, what has brought me saying this? As I said, life in school is been like a drama to me. And yes, I am definitely involved in this. I fake, sometimes. I pretend. But my intention of faking and pretending is never bad. Sometimes people may be saying that I betray or forget about my good friends if they see me together with the other gang of friends. But I am definitely not. I know who are my good friends, and I know who are the ones who worth my trustiness and loyalty. Joining the other gang doesn't mean I'm not your close friends anymore. In fact, it means I'm trying my best to influence others. Therefore, please respect me as a good friend. I have my own choices to make and I'll be the one who's supposed to have this responsibility in making these choices.

Alright. Time flies. Guess that's it. Thanks for reading! I appreciate it. =)

Rawrr!

AHHHHH. I am so angry at myself now! Why didn't I study earlier? Why didn't I practice more? Why didn't I pay attention when teachers were teaching? Why? Why? WHYYYY????????

YES. Currently I'm struggling for my Add Maths. It's so damn freaking CONFUSING. Other than that, I have to deal with sooooooo many damn freaking things! They're like all come to me AT ONCE. HOW HOW HOW?!?!

NEVERMIND. I shall tell myself over and over again that IT'S OKAY. When life is filled with things and you're forced to deal with all of them, REMEMBER ONE IMPORTANT THING. No matter you're happy or sad, you still have to LIVE YOUR LIFE. So why not live to the fullest and live happily? RIGHT?! BUAHAHAHHA. I sound like a damn ahpek! xD. But it's true. And please don't get me wrong. True as in the facts that I've just mentioned. NOT that it's true that I'm a damn ahpek!

So yeah. Gotta keep on striving and striving to the fullest! DON'T PLAY PLAY WITH ME. I AM CURRENTLY FILLED WITH A REALLY REALLY UNBREAKABLE AND STRONG LIFE FORCE NOW! YOU BETTER BEWARE OF ME. AS I MIGHT CUT YOU INTO PIECES AND EAT YOU ALIVE!

The one that got away.

Should I remove my Chat Box? Since there are so many unwanted/uninvited guests visiting. =.=

GLee.

Glee season 2 is OFFICIALLY OUT! Check out the first episode and I have no idea why is it mirrored. LOL.

Baby tale.

HAHAHAHA. I can't stop laughing. Check it out!

Darren: Hmmm.. The chocolate over there looks good.
Daddy: ............

Darren: Hmmmm.. Which one should I choose? White choc or black choc?
Daddy: Have you decided? I'm falling asleep..

Darren: Alright. Decided! Excuse me. Can you please get me one bar of white choc?
Daddy: Finally decided. *relieved*

Yeap. This is MY Darren boy. Cute ain't he? xD

That's the way I loved you.

Now it's 2.35 in the morning and yeap, I am still here. =D Alright, just a real short update.

I am feeling AWESOME.

C=

Just keep pushing on.

刚才你问我介不介意刚才你对我说的那几句话。顿时，我突然觉得很对不起你。。要问介不介意的人不是你，而是我！妈，你介不介意刚才我对你那不理不睬的态度呢？当时的你，一定很不好受吧。对不起。。

你说得对。钱对我们来说很重要。就算它不是万能，但它可说是九千能。你之所以会对我说那几句话，也只不过不想看着我白白将自己的前途给毁灭掉。刚才在观看《家好月圆》的时候，荷妈说的一句话打动了我。她说：“我们做父母的，看见自己的孩子出了事，我们能怎样呢？难道我们就不想坐下来大哭一场吗？现在我们没时间去胡思乱想，我们更没有资格去哭， 因为他们是我们的孩子。我们绝对不可以崩溃！”。看到这里，我就联想起以前你对我说过的往事。当时虽然家里真的是穷到连买面包都得三思，但是当时的你是多么地坚强，多么地不屈服啊！捱来捱去，现在终于都捱出头了。而我这个做孩子的，却没有尽责到做孩子的责任。。

妈，我答应你。我一定会发奋图强，努力地去读好我的书来的。今年的SPM测验，我一定不会让你失望的！这是我对你的承诺！

Lost in thoughts.

I... am tired.

Can someone hear me?

I am really tired..

of everything.

It was only just a dream.

真是从来都没遇过这么笨蛋的人。人家有说过她喜欢你吗？人家有说过她想你吗？没有！根本就只有你自己一厢情愿吧了。好啦，现在搞到自己伤心啦，自己压抑不住心情啦。能怪的了谁？你！要怪就只能怪你这个自以为是的大白痴！谁叫你一天到晚都以为人家会喜欢你？屁啦！从来都没见过这么臭美的人！还臭美到随随便便就叫人家babeyy。你以为一句babeyy就是在搞暧昧啊？一句babeyy就是代表她接收你啊？别做梦啦你！省点吧你！

考试就快到了。好心你就快快收拾心情去读书吧！别再发白日梦了！

Stefani Germanotta.

I got mesmerised by this awesome desktop wallpaper.

Ain't she BEAUTIFUL?
And no, this ain't Christina Aguilera.

This is what I thought about.

You were in college, working part time waiting tables

Left a small town, never looked back

I was a flight risk, with a fear of falling

Wondering why we bother with love, if it never lasts

Say, can you believe it?

As we're lying on the couch

The moment, I can see it

Yes, yes, I can see it now

Do you remember we were sitting there by the water

You put your arm around me for the first time
You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter

You are the best thing that's ever been mine

Flash forward and we're taking on the world together

And there's a drawer of my things at your place

You learned my secrets and you figured out why I'm guarded

You said we'll never make my parent's mistakes

But we got bills to pay

We got nothing figured out

When it was hard to take

Yes, yes, this is what I thought about

Do you remember we were sitting there by the water
You put your arm around me for the first time
You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter
You are the best thing that's ever been mine

Do you remember all the city lights on the water

You saw me start to believe for the first time

You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter

You are the best thing that's ever been mine

And I remember that fight, two thirty AM

Yes, everything was slipping right out of our hands
I ran out crying and you followed me out into the street

Braced myself for the goodbye

'Cause this is all I've ever known

And you took me by surprise

You said, I'll never leave you alone

You said, I remember how we felt sitting by the water

And everytime I look at you, it's like the first time
I fell in love with a careless man's careful daughter

She is the best thing that's ever been mine

You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter

You are the best thing that's ever been mine

Do you believe it?
Gonna make it now
I can see it
See it now

- Mine,

Taylor Swift

We've got nothing figured out.

I really want to blog today. I really do. But I just can't seem to find a topic to talk about. There are so much incidents happened lately which made me felt totally down and that is one of the reasons why I can't seem to cheer myself up.

I always wanted to be the special one. I always wanted to be the one people would look up to. After getting what I've always wanted all this while, I realise this desire of mine is not something that I can afford to have. People start paying attention to me. People start having high expectation from me and it's not something that I can always maintain with.

People may think that I'm an arrogant person, because of those school and society posts that I have to deal with and yes, I'm afraid of losing them all. People envy of me, some might even jealous of me. I didn't really care what people think of me but now, I mind, even though I might don't voice out anything about it. I start to hate, no, I detest the glaring-look of people around me.

Guess that I just need to keep everything to myself and lock them all up. I have no one that I can talk to, as I don't really want people start questioning me about this. I'm sick of this moment of my life.

Anyway, once you see this, that's it. It will be kept in here and I hope I don't see people talking about it in front of me. Please and thank you.

Cutest baby boy.

This is my baby boy, Darren Foo Guo Wei.

He does many many things which made me thinks that he is the cutest baby ever that I have ever seen in my entire lifetime:

1) He SMILES when the mama scolds him.
2) He BABY-TALKS to himself every morning when he wakes up.
3) He DANCES when he hears we singing The Barney Song.
4) He BOOS with his saliva when he is bored.
5) He CRAWLS all the time even when he is in the car.
6) He TOSSES his pacifier when he wants to eat.
7) He POINTS at his mama when he wants her to carry him.
8) He TIP-TOES when he stands.
9) He MAKES funny emotion when he tastes something cold.
10) He WANTS me to carry him some of the time. =D


And THIS, is the photo that I'm obsessed with.

I LOVE YOU, DARREN BOY!

We together are one.

Actually, I don't want to post anything today wan.. But since there are soooooo many people out there want me to blog SOOOOOOO BADLY, okay la okay la, I'll blog for the sake of those people. You KNOW who you are. =)

Alright, today. I'll talk about our country, since there are people who don't appreciate it. Alright people. Let me ask you people one simple question. Do you know where you're come from? Australia? America? Africa? New Zealand? NO. YOU'RE FROM MALAYSIA.

And what's all about this racism happening recently? Alright, talk about the most recent one. Siti Insyah. YES. She DID humiliate us. She DID ask us to go back to China. But before she did all this, what were WE doing? We ATE in front of them. And do you define this as RESPECT? DID WE ever respect them at the first place? WE DID NOT.

And yes. What she did was, well, over the limit. But can you people please use your brains to think PROPERLY before you do something? IF WE keep on complaining about this incident, do you think racism will ever be STOPPED? HELL NO. It will just get WORSE. Yes, sometimes there are people out there who are very racist, there are people out there who don't RESPECT other races. BUT if we try to change our point of view FIRST, do you think the racism will still continue?

Try to change your angle in seeing things. Look at the good and fine sides. Our country is full of our OWN unique culture which OTHER COUNTRIES don't. Have you seen ANY country with Roti Canai, Nasi Lemak and Char Siew Pau under the SAME roof before? Have you seen ANY country with DIFFERENT races before? NO. ONLY US. ONLY MALAYSIA. Even we have our OWN country jokes. "What is the stingiest animal?" "It's HORSE! Cause when it runs, it will make sounds like KEDEKUT KEDEKUT KEDEKUT".

SO PEOPLE. START loving our country more! It's UNIQUE and it's IRREPLACEABLE. Start to respect others FIRST so the other people will respect you. BEAR THIS IN YOUR MIND DEEPLY if you don't want to see news like people whacking a person who's a different race from theirs.

You knew that I was free.

Now my mood is just like this song.

Yes. It's Telephone. I'd rather dance, sing, or do other stuff than picking up your phone! So, STOP CALLING ME CAUSE I DON'T WANNA THINK OR TALK ANYMORE.

Everybody loves Taylor.

This video starts a fire in me, somehow. Kanye West disses Taylor Swift in VMA's Award. You gotta watch this and I'm sorry that the quality of this video sucks. I tried searching for better quality ones but this is the best that I could give.

How do you feel? Angry? Yes, I am. Even though this incident happened last year, the anger just starts stirring in me. And thank god that there were people out there who actually voiced out about it. This is what Kelly Clarkson posted in her official blog:

Dear Kanye,

What happened to you as a child?? Did you not get hugged enough?? Something must have happened to make you this way and I think we’re all just curious as to what would make a grown man go on national television and make a talented artist, let alone teenager, feel like shit. I mean, I’ve seen you do some pretty shitty things, but you just keep amazing me with your tactless, asshole ways. It’s absolutely fascinating how much I don’t like you. I like everyone. I even like my asshole ex that cheated on me over you…which is pretty odd since I don’t even personally know you. The best part of this evening is that you weren’t even up for THIS award and yet you still have a problem with the outcome. Is winning a moon man that much of a life goal?? You can have mine if it will shut you up. Is it that important, really??

I was actually nominated in the same category that Taylor won and I was excited for her…so why can’t you be?? I’m not even mad at you for being an asshole…I just pity you because you’re a sad human being.

On a side note, Beyonce has always been a class act and proved again tonight that she still is. Go TEXAS!!

Taylor Swift, you outsell him ….that’s why he’s bitter. You know I love your work! Keep it up girl!

KC

Way to go, Kelly! =D. And the funny part about this incident was, Katy Perry even posted THIS in her Twitter:

"FUCK YOU, KANYE."

LOL. That's the reason why I don't like listening to black people's music, especially that bastard Kanye's. Anyway, the name "Kanye" somehow makes me think of Kentucky Fried Chicken. xD

Turn around, bright eyes.

There's nothing I can do,

A total eclipse of the heart.

This Ferris wheel's got me crazy.

Last time, I thought we had this talk
Boy, you were getting ready to leave
I thought that baby you were done
'Cause for a while, you could barely look at me

This time, I thought that we'd be fine
That I'd forget the things that you said
I tried crossing out your words
But baby you cannot forget the past
Cannot forget the past
Still, baby

I'm so unpredictable
You don't know what to think
So unemotional
Wonder if I'm even still in love, you see
I don't know what to tell you now
It's always harder, this second time around
I'm so unpredictable
Just like you used to be
So unemotional
Boy, I can't forget the way you were with me
I don't know what to tell you now
It's always harder, this second time around
This second time around

We tried going back to Joe's
That always was our favourite place
Long rides, baby by the coast
Do you remember where we stayed?
Last time, we were hanging out
You were acting kind of strange
Now it's the second time around
I'm sorry, now it's me that feels this way
(My heart just speaks to me)
It's me that feels this way
I know you are the one that is brave

I'm so unpredictable
You don't know what to think
So unemotional
Wonder if I'm even still in love, you see
I don't know what to tell you now
It's always harder, this second time around
I'm so unpredictable
Just like you used to be
So unemotional
Boy, I can't forget the way you were with me
I don't know what to tell you now
It's always harder, this second time around

I'm not sure the best of way to say this
But I can't pretend to love you no more, babe
This Ferris wheel's got me crazy
Maybe the second time around is not meant for us, baby
Not meant for us, baby

I'm so unpredictable

You don't know what to think

So unemotional

Wonder if I'm even still in love, you see

I don't know what to tell you now

It's always harder, this second time around

I'm so unpredictable

Just like you used to be

So unemotional

Boy, I can't forget the way you were with me

I don't know what to tell you now

It's always harder, this second time around

I'm so unpredictable

You don't know what to think

So unemotional

Wonder if I'm even still in love, you see

I don't know what to tell you now

It's always harder, this second time around

I'm so unpredictable

Just like you used to be

So unemotional

Boy, I can't forget the way you were with me

I don't know what to tell you now

It's always harder, this second time around
This second time around

- Second Time Around,

Lady GaGa